Session 1: Living Energy of Needs & Primary Needs
- Create 1-2 intention: decision (conscious/ not) to produce/ experience an outcomeI want to feel calm, relaxed, clear. I want to live my life, my way, aligned with God.
What's the outcomes, end-point, not a little bit "feel a bit more...".
Need=quality when experienced, enhances life/ wellbeing
Say a word just as a word, and say when we experience the experience
REST
AFFECTION - take your hand and touch your cheek in an affectionate way
Pair practice:
A tell B the need important
Both sit and feel the energy of that
Empathy & compassion - healing forces
Primary Development Needs never got met
First year: bonding (held, eye-contact where I feel I exist)
Second stage: Set boundaries with unconditional love
Stage 3 (4-7yo): Self-expression, creative, I am here and there are others, socializing, differentiation
For your own good - Alice Miller
Bruce Perry
Chaotic - anger
Impoverished environment
Unlivable contracts: suppresses life
Honor the protective energy, structures that got us through
If I'm really good, I'll not be abandoned. Hypervigilant to be around an erratic parent.
If I'm hardworking, not lazy, mom will not diss me, mom will not suffer, I will not be in pain.
If I'm quiet and don't ask for things, I'll be okay. No one will get upset. I'll be safe.
If I don't cause a ruckus, I'll be safe.
Session 2: Brain basics
Hippocamus
Cortex: thick as 6 biz cards, aactually very thin
All emotions comes to brain through body
Limbic system: scans for danger, survival function, assessing meaning, releasing hormones
Amygdala: memory - implicit memory, explicit memory (processed to cortext), sub-structure to persona
Mental models - core beliefs/ absolute truths
Pre-cognitive system: earlier than speech, talking will not help
Sense of time only develops at age of 7
Register intensity, reached through the body
Sense the needs in the body. Intensively sense my needs.
Move implicit memories out of timeless amygdala into hippocamus
GABA: calming
being in the beauty of the neds and being in the loss & sadness
Healing: Partnership between left & right
Breathing exercise: immune, empathy, blood flow
https://www.nvclibrary.com/getting-past-childhood-trauma-transform-chronic-messages-8-session-course/videos/getting-past-childhood-trauma-transform-chronic-messages-session-3
Transform pain into energy of needs --> Gonzales
Mmourning - not in the pain/ lack of it, but in the beauty of it
Executive function, compassionate witnness = Giraffe
Mind our mind, grow new brain tissue, mind manages flow of info & energy
1. Wellbeing is learnable, can be cultivated through repeated practical steps
2. When we develop mind management skills, new tissue grows
3. Wellbeing is created when we Integrate the separate parts of our brain & nervous system (left-right hemisphere, mind--body)
4. It takes time, attention, repetition
Session 3: Trauma, Memory Storage, Chronic Trigger
Mourning: Fullness & deficit
I'm in pain about this ... because I so want ...
Shifting from helplessness & pain into beauty of need
Stay with the feeling of "this feels so good"
The brain is always attempting to recognize what it has learnt to anticipate
Attached to non--attachment, and everyone has a life force wanting to express
As long as I don't look for [ways to fulfil all my needs] in another person, but in myself & the universe
Feel something strongly
>< limbic activation (want to leave, kick in midsection, limbic upset, thrown into a different state that maintain for some time, inhibit social activity & ability to enjoy life)
Differentiation & Integration --> trauma disrupts both
Trauma: incident result in unprocessed mmemory - produce unconscious behavior / emotion, damage/ obstruct wellbeing
Physical lack of dvelopment, Romanian babies brain smaller by 1 pound
No internalized circuitry to regulate themselves
Low amount of yummy chemicals
IMPLICIT & EXPLICIT MEMORY
Only 25 watts of ennergy go to brain
brain stem - fight flight
amygdala - threat
these grab all energy
disorientation & confusion
cortex not developed until 6--7yo, only function in limbic
store emotions & memory in amygdala
mom's cortex help child's body regulate
Process memory = move memory from amygdala to hippocampus -- store info coherenntly, connected to cortex = coherent story of themselves, made sense
GABA = antidote to adrenaline
I'm back into reading, watching romance overnight. When I feel stressed
I finished work. I wanted to take my mind off.
19/6 I talked with Thuy. She said, let's head back. Call me when you come. I felt like I haven't contributed enough, I wasn't showering her with goodness and now she's upset.
2/8 (1.5 months later). I talked with Ha. We got to a good point. I've been working and working.
PTNK before Singapore. I had to be first or second. Mom was stressed. This is too demanding, too high--climbing.
Endless hours.
Afraid I'm not going to make it. Afraid all is lost. Afraid there isn't enough time.
Go into that circuitry and feel what it feels -- scared, wanting soothing touch
- Identify a pattern in my life, when x happen I ...
- Observable stimulus/ thought - what exactly happened
- Fight - flight - freeze
- Where in my body?
- Breathe with sensation
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